Simulated Porn Musician's Journal
?

Log in

Simulated Porn Musician's Journal [entries|friends|calendar]
Simulated Porn Musician

[ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ]
[ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

CONCERNING LAYOUT! [08 Mar 2015|11:12pm]
ATTETION PEOPLE OF LIVEJOURNAL
THANKS FOR THE GESTURE OF COMPLIMENTING ME ON "MY" PICTURES IN THE LAYOUT OF MY JOURNAL, BUT THE ONLY WAY, SHAPE, OR FORM THOSE ARE MY PICS IS I PUT THEM TOGETHER, SO PLEASE DONT FUCKING BOTHER TO MESSAGE ME IN ANY WAY TO TELL ME THAT "I AM" HOTT UNLESS YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT... MY LAYOUT WAS CREATED WITH PICTURES OF ANOTHER PERSON AND IM SURE IF THEY WANT ALL YOUR RESPONSES THEY'LL BE KIND ENOUGH TO LET ME KNOW, FURTHERMORE, I HAVE YET TO CREATE A LAYOUT OF ME, AND LACK ANY AMBITION TO DO SO IN THE FUTURE, SO LET IT BE KNOWN FROM HERE ON OUT THAT MY PHOTOS DO NOT GRACE THE LAYOUT OF MY JOURNAL... SO DO NOT ADD, TALK, OR COMMENT TO ME SAYING HOW HOTT I LOOK... CAUSE FOR ONE I AM NOT INTERESTED IN YOUR FRIENDSHIP IF YOU BASE IT UPON THE LAYOUT OF MY JOURNAL AND NOT ITS CONTENT, AND I DO NOT CREATE MY LAYOUTS FOR ALL YOU HORNY ASSHOLES TO COME RUNNING TO ADD ME CAUSE YOU THINK ITS ME AND YOU THINK YOU'LL BE GRACED BY THE PRESENCE OF A BEAUTIFUL WOMEN OR HOTT MEN!!!!!!!!
THANKS
MANDYKAY
134 sloths| love chunk

[01 Jul 2004|06:37pm]
boo bitches
1 sloth| love chunk

ok i think its time.... [09 Nov 2003|07:14pm]
[ mood | infuriated ]

yanno, some people are so fucking pathetic... you keep one person on hold while getting to know another JUST IN CASE even though you deny it.... you gotta flirt with everyone else... you gotta make someones life so miserable that they are convinced from then on that the whole world is against them... you have to make someone feel so ugly that they are convinced no one will ever love them... JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!!
i like to observe, i like to sit back and watch peoples relationships, even my own, i try to step outside of them and get a view, and really its rather pathetic some of the things i have seen... yet some of you dont allow a move to be made for the better... GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSLEVES!!!! if youre in love get the fuck off your ass and prove that fucking shit... i know so many people who are perfect, every man's desire and the men treat them like shit, and there are some girls who just use everything they got to come between that or whatever.... this SHIT is fucked up... some people would kill to have that shit, and some people just wanna do what it takes to fuck everyone else over cause someone had to hurt them... get your head out of your ass, get over whoever the fuck you think you are, stop telling yourself that someone is gonna love you when he loves everyone else just as much, and get smart enough to realize that while your busy being an ass, flirting, fucking around, dicking around people, that there is someone whos waiting for you to just turn and see them....

and i know no one will really have anything fucking intelligent to say to this so it'll be one of the few entries i keep comment free...

[29 May 2003|01:19pm]
cause i have nothing else better to say and like anyone cares anyways
My name is: mandy
In the morning I am: dead tot he world
All I need is: the possibilities are endless
I'm afraid of: death
I dream about: weird stuff

-W I T H .T H E. O P P O S I T E / S A M E. S E X-
What do you notice first?: eyes or lips
Last person u slow danced with: stepphie
Worst question to ask: are you stupid?

-D O. Y O U .E V E R-
Sit on the internet all day waiting for someone special to I.M. you?: yes
Save aol/aim conversations: i have for a while
Wish you were a member of the opposite sex: maybe for a while

-W H O .W A S .T H E .L A S T. P E R S O N-
You talked to on the phone: sarah
Hugged: bethany
You instant messaged: dre
You laughed with: sarah
Kissed: bethany

-D O .Y O U-

Color your hair: yes
Ever get off the damn computer: yes
Habla espanol: si solamente un poquito

-D O .Y O U / / A R E .Y O U-
Smoke cigarettes: yes
Obsessive: with certain things
Could you live without the computer?: no
How many peeps are on your buddylist?: well considering i have three chat services, A LOT
Whats your favorite food?: italian, chinese
Whats your favorite fruit?: oranges
Drink alcohol?: yes
Like watching sunrises or sunset: yes
What hurts the most? physical pain or emotional pain?: emotional it takes the loongest to heal
Trust others way too easily?: not as much anymore

-N U M B E R-
Of times I have had my heart broken?: 3
Of boys I have kissed? : OMG
Of girls I have kissed? : 8
Of times I have moved? : 1
Of tight friends? : 6
Of cd's that I own? : over 300
Of scars on my body? : about 8
Of things in my past that I regret? : i dont believe in regret you learn and enjoy nothing

I KNOW: love
I WANT: happiness
I HAVE: conquered
I WISH: i had a million dollars
I HATE: hatered
I MISS: drivnig
I FEAR: death of loved ones
I HEAR: sarah
I SEARCH: for myself
I WONDER: if you love me
I REGRET: nothing
I LOVE: my family, dre, my godchild
I ACHE: for you
I CARE: about who i am
I AM NOT: forgotten
I DANCE: when im happy
I SING: all the time
I CRY: to heal
I DO NOT ALWAYS: have the answers
I WRITE: when i have shit to say
I WIN: in the end
I LOSE: only if i dont try
I CONFUSE: myself
I LISTEN: because i care
I CAN USUALLY BE FOUND: right here
I NEED: compassion
I AM HAPPY ABOUT: my direction
I SHOULD: have noticed my potential long ago
I GOT THIS FROM: thatdamngood
7 sloths| love chunk

[24 May 2003|02:44pm]
well i have decided that from here on out my journal entries will be friends only... i have tried to keep my journal as open as possible, but it seems only more and more people come and judge me, and i find myself making more and more protected posts... so sorry to the people who dont have journals and have positive things to say, like i have stated im ready to move to a more positive phase of my life, and im not gonna put myself out there if people are gonna drag me down... if you come to my journal and would like to be added feel free to leave a message here, since i have decided to leave the past open... but the more the stupid people the more i will close myself off...

17 sloths| love chunk

[23 May 2003|02:20pm]
[ mood | loved ]

for you i'd bleed myself dry

9 sloths| love chunk

[21 May 2003|01:17pm]
the best fucking album quite possibly in the entire fucking universe..... god i missed listening to this....
'Cause if I died tonight,
Would you hold my head, oh,
Would you understand?

And if I lied in spite,
Would you still be here,
No, would you disappear?

I FUCKING LOVE THIS FUCKING ALBUM AND IM TELLING YOU RIGHT NOW IF YOU DONT HAVE IT, FUCKING BUY IT OR DOWNLOAD OR WHATEVER!!!!!!!!!!

for people who dont know its the cranberries- no need to argue
2 sloths| love chunk

[16 May 2003|01:54pm]
i hate today and its quite possible i'll hate tomorrow too....

im thinkin one of two things are gonna go down, im gonna shrink down the friends list or im gonna go friends only... im done being open.....

but its doubtful i'll even end up giving a shit...
2 sloths| love chunk

[15 May 2003|11:38pm]
whatever..... i tried to be polite but apprently i cant anymore... so bye bye

this is what it feels like to be numb....
2 sloths| love chunk

[15 May 2003|03:59pm]
mmmmmmmm icons
mmmmm chris cornell
mmmmmm water
mmmmmmmmmm







thanks littlemayte for the link to these pics!
28 sloths| love chunk

[15 May 2003|01:44pm]
well sarah and i drove down to portage yesterday so she could see josh... and it took us three hours to get there cause what josh failed to mention is that 68 is 151, and the last portion of 151 is the part where it turns to 68... so we drove all the way to allenton to hit 33... i swear to god we went through dodge county like 5 times, and went in this huge circle, but we got there... and then it took us an hour and a half to get back... and then josh blamed us... saying i should know 151 was 68 LIKE I FREAKIN DRIVE 151 EVERYDAY doof... he of course had to give us shit... and the last 10 minutes we have to listen to B screaming and sarah and i were just like "omg quiet for just a minute" and the minute we get to the stop she falls asleep... little brat...
but all the way home we had peace and quiet, and we talked... it was funny cause we were talking about how it would be fun to be cops, and like pull people over for going one over, and like strip search all the hot people, and then this cop like drives along side of us and sarah gasps and i just bust out laughing...
so we spent 7 hours getting to and from and in portage, when my brother is coming home today... only sarah...
love chunk

[13 May 2003|06:54pm]
poop i called your dad a cunt LMAO!!!!!!!!! i thought it was you and i said "hey cunt"
4 sloths| love chunk

[13 May 2003|01:35pm]
there were really two people who i owe my love for graphics and my love for icon making to kanyraverboi and maxalba now since i have already made a collage of my ancient nick icons... this next one goes to gabe, my first ever friends layout... who has thus inspired me to continue to make friend layouts, and who graces my layout today.... this is the maxalba collage...
Read more...Collapse )
2 sloths| love chunk

FUN FUN GATHER ROUND..... [13 May 2003|11:23am]
10 interesting facts about mandy (in no particular order)
1. i live in a 2 story, 70 year old house, in a city of almost 16,000.
2. i watch star trek voyager every night
3. im obssessed, and have a collection of cherry/sour apple suckers.
4. i am a sucker for inscense
5. every saturday i clean my parents bathroom
6. i am in love with eyes, every person i know has beautiful eyes
7. im more likely to find more joy in handmade things, then things bought in a store.
8. ive won medals for singing
9. i have a mass populous of stuffed animals in my room
10. im such a proud leo that i put the constellation in glow in the dark stars on my wall.

now time for a sill mandy story....
when i was about one my parents were going to this church, and they would always bring me to the nursery. well as i have been told, as my parents were told, one of the little boys i ended up growing up with, and who never picked on me again after this, was sitting outside my crib running a toy along the runs. the lady in the nursery thought it was cute that the little boy seemed to be getting my attention, and because i was in the crib trying to sleep i apparently became aggravated, put my arms through the runs, grabbed the little boy by his hair, and pulled him clear off the ground. i dont think i was ever told if i did get to sleep or not but i remember the kid, and he used to follow me around the church, and try and kiss me, and we would play red light green light, and hed always lose for me.

so i hope youve all had fun with mandy facts...

now its your turn, tell me 5 interesting things about yourself that i dont already know.
stolen from jtwistCollapse )
35 sloths| love chunk

[12 May 2003|08:08pm]
im bored.....
8 sloths| love chunk

[12 May 2003|04:28pm]
i hate how sad my mom is, i hate what has happened, i hate that im a part of it, i hate that no one will even be close to comprehending how i feel about it, i hate that i want people to do so much more than relate, i hate that i dont understand, i hate that it made such a rift, i hate it that everytime i look into her eyes thats what i see, and most of all i hate years.....


sorry i know most of you really dont give a crap about this, but it had to be said, i mean it's ongoing, and sometimes i wonder if i leave if it will follow me, if i will be able to stay away or if my fear of her being gone will consume me... ive come so close to having last moments with my mother that its like im so afriad to leave, im so afraid to miss a chance, im so afraid to hurt her by moving on with my life, im so afraid of being more....

its so fucked up how much this messes with my head, how much i let it, and how much i hide it from everyone around me. cause i dont want it to follow me anymore, but sooner or later it comes out, and its like my weakness is hers, and people seem to view me so different. i hate not having anyone to talk to, i hate not allowing myself to talk about it, i just wish i could have some happy medium with it...

and i wonder will anyone ever let me?
7 sloths| love chunk

[12 May 2003|12:01pm]
so last night stephie and i hung out, went to slims/river city/jake and elwoods/ whatever the fuck its called now had a few drinks... 2 double shot j&c and a shot of crown for me... the girl working there was really awesome, and then we went to her house and i got to see her rott puppy, tank, hes so cute. and then we went to black creek to get her fiance, who was out there getting a tattoo... and steph and i talked about getting little matching tattoos, of those cartoon baby devils, they were all cute and shit... but im not quite sure yet...
so thats about it
4 sloths| love chunk

[09 May 2003|12:29pm]
ok weird dream about lj users time....
so its at my house, im with sarah and her kids, and i get a phone call saying that gabe and cass are outside, so i go open the door and there they are, and after our "OH MY GOD'S" and a billion hugs we go back upstairs and i introduce them to sarah and the kids, and they are all "so this is who you talk about" and so we are talking about this party we are going to later on that night and cass is like "you have to do my hair" and i did it and it was all cute and shit, and then we got dressed and ready to go, and gabe was wearing this blue button down shirt and some dockers or something and cass had on this little sparkly mini skirt and one of those open back shirts and with her hair it looked all modelish, i dont know what i was wearing... so we are on our way outta the house and gabe is all "i want a group hug" so we give a group hug and me, gabe, and cass kiss at the same time.... we then meet up with sarah and are walking to the house all giggling......
and i wake up.......

yeah weird, although that would be so cool, well maybe not all how it went but to just be sitting around and have awesome people show up at your house.....

All my players in the house that can buy the bar
And the ballin-ass niggaz wit the candy cars
If you a pimp and you know you don't love them hoes
When you get on the flo' - nigga throw dem 'bows
All my women in the house if you chasin cash
And you got some big titties wit a matchin ass
Witcha fly-ass boots or ya open toes
When ya get on the flo' - nigga throw dem 'bows

so last night poop, josh, karlyn, and i all hung out... it was freakin crazy, we have pics so ill probably post a couple in a bit, but we went to perkins and i know karlyn would hate me for this but shes so adorable and is my soulmate, but we went to perkins and she spilled ICE cold water all on my punany... so we had the waitress bring her one of those kids cups with a lid.... OMG shes so hilarious! and shes a leo!!!
and josh was suffering from "i hear you but i cant make out what youre saying" syndrome.... and i had said i killed two birds with one stone, and hes like "if you need help press one?" and karlyn and i were practically on the floor....

i really needed to hang out with all them, i feel a lot better now.... i missed poop so much, and all of us together is just out of control... and josh said the cutest thing to me "when im hanging out with you two i can just sit back and enjoy myself, cause you guys have so many little jokes with each other that are so hilarious. when you two are together i can see your friendship just come through"
I LOVE YOU POOP CUNT!!!!!!!!!! hehehehe!
28 sloths| love chunk

[08 May 2003|04:07pm]
so i made some icons a while back.... never posted them so im going to now..... this is some nonanimated work which is fucking hard to do cause i love to make animated icons.... but the last one is cause i made it today...
lots of iconsCollapse )
27 sloths| love chunk

[08 May 2003|01:02pm]
leo
You should be a Leo, Outgoing, warm, friendly,
generous, loyal, likable, entertaining, likes
attention, confident, cherrful, creative,
strong-willed, charismatic, proud, extrovert,
but can be demanding, dogmatic, controlling,
afraid of rejection


~*What is your TRUE Zodica sign?*~
brought to you by Quizilla


UMMM I AM A LEO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
33 sloths| love chunk

navigation
[ viewing | most recent entries ]
[ go | earlier ]